We Welcome Our New Dictators - 29th of April, 2018
We Welcome Our New Dictators
Mike:Good evening and welcome to concave news, your most trusted news source on the interwebs. This is Mike.
Dana: And this is Dana.
Mike:With the elections out of the picture our new dictator/prime minister will be able to make sweeping changes across the country to all manner of legislation that currently holds us back.
Dana:What? Mike? What?
Mike:Democracy has always held us back, inefficient, bureaucratic - guaranteed corruption and a slow moving behemoth. With our new unelected officials we'll be moving forwards with great speed.
Dana:We'll be moving Mike, but I don't know about forwards. History shows us that..
Mike:History - that's where democracy belongs, it should have died out with the Greeks. And look at Greece now - a basket case of nepotism and economic woe. No, Dana, a benevolent dictator is just what this country and our world needs. Look at how many things we'll get done!
Dana:One moment - let's look at our new leader's track record. Where does he stand on the issues that matter? Wasn't his success just the random pot luck of his birth circumstances? What does he actually know about diplomacy, or foreign affairs, or on successfully balancing stakeholders requirements in challenging situations?
Mike:Well he ran a successful reality television show - that surely counts for something? He knows how to bullshit - and in my book that's an excellent criteria for a good leader?
Dana:Remind me not to vote for anyone you support Mike.
Mike:Don't worry - there'll be no more voting, no more elections - we never have to bother ourselves with making decisions between one corrupt politician to another.
Dana:Elections and democracy may have flaws but it's so far the best system we've had - let's see what you think when unelected officials begin losing the plot and cracking down on minority groups, the disabled, the homeless, and religious groups. It's where it always seems to end up.
Mike:There are always winners and losers in every change of system-
Dana:These are human beings we're talking about Mike, not just tokens in some political game. Anyway with a free press we've still got some hope.
Mike:See - I knew you'd see the positive in it.
Dana:And to our next news story - the anti wrinkle cream that took away a lot more than just one woman's wrinkles!